Hahahaha I can't stop laughing at this JOKE!!!

Akpos got admitted into my village school, Atabala Grammar School. The best school in my village. On his first day in the school, an Inspector of Education came visiting. Yes those days we had Inspectors of Education visit schools to check what is happening! Good old days!!

The Christian Religion Studies (CRS) teacher was in class telling the students the story of DANIEL IN THE LION'S DEN when he sighted the Principal and the Inspector heading
towards the class. In those days, teachers feared Principals and Inspectors! Not like these days!!

The old and forgetful CRS teacher in panic wrote GENESIS as the topic on the board without thinking. When they entered the class,

Class: Good mooooooorning sir, we are happy to see you sir.
Inspector: Good morning class, I can see your teacher is telling you what happened in the book of Genesis?.
Class: Yeeeeeeeees sir!.


Inspector (pointing to Akpos): Ok, you there, who killed Abel?.
Akpos: Sir i don't know, i have been in the class since 8am, ask my friend Itoro, I
didn't kill Abel sir.
Inspector (angry): I said who killed Abel?
Akpos: I am a Christian, I don't kill. I don't even know this Abel you are talking about. Sir, is he in our class?.
Inspector (Turning to the Teacher): Ok, Teacher can you tell the class who killed Abel?
Teacher (Knees down and open his hands wide): My son, How can you expect me to
kill, what example will I be showing to my students if I kill a person?.


Inspector (disappointedly turns to the principal): Ok class the principal will help to
tell us who killed Abel. Mr principal, who killed Abel?.
Principal: When you came to my office, didn't you see me there?.
Inspector: Yes, I did!.
Principal: Did you see blood stains in my hands?.
Inspector: No!.
Principal: How could I have killed Abel? What class is he in sef? But why are you asking me? Where is the proof that I did?. Please don't accuse me ooo. These children will kill somebody and they will be denying!! One of you should own up ooo! Bad children!!!

The whole class stood up and swore that none of them killed Abel!!

The Inspector has not recovered since!!! Lol!

What if you can roll up your TV like a newspaper? LG has made it possible.

Wow!!! very soon wide screen TV's will be so potable that you can fold and pocket one...

At this week's CES technology expo, LG is one of many TV makers to show off an impressive lineup of super-duper-high-definition TVs. But there's one thing that separates LG from the competition. You can roll up one of LG's TVs like a newspaper.
The 18-inch display is just one of the concept designs LG will be unveiling, as it attempts to predict the future of television screens. Also on display will be a 55-inch TV that is as thin as a piece of paper and a 65-inch "extreme-curve" set of TVs that bend inwards and outwards.
None of these TV will be sold this year -- and it's possible they may never hit stores. It's also not totally clear why you'd want to roll up or bend your TV.
Like automakers' "concept cars," LG's TVs are meant to show off what's possible, even if it's not yet marketable, affordable or able to be mass-produced for customers. But some elements of LG's creations may come to your next television screen.
TV makers continue to up the ante, developing ultra-high definition televisions that produce richer pictures, virtually unnoticeable bezels and thinner profiles. But those TVs are becoming virtually indistinguishable from one another.
It's concepts like LG's that may one day push the industry forward into new markets and technologies it hasn't yet considered.

cnn.com

Twitter to dump its 140 character limit.

The company is said to be looking to lift the character limit to 10,000 by the end of this quarter, according to Re/Code.
Twitter founder and CEO Jack Dorsey took to Twitter (TWTR, Tech30) Tuesday afternoon to neither confirm nor deny the report.
He posted a Twitter photo of his statement (so he could get around the platform's current limitations).
The 140 character limit has "become a beautiful constraint," wrote Dorsey. "It inspires creativity and brevity ... We will never lose that feeling."
But Dorsey reiterated that Twitter wasn't born with the character restriction, it was added in Twitter's early days so that text could fit in a single SMS message.
Dorsey said user behavior makes it clear that people might enjoy the ability to expand on their thoughts.
"We see [people] taking screenshots of text and tweeting it. Instead, what if that text ... was actually text?" he said. "We're not going to be shy about building more utility and power into Twitter for people."
This would just be Twitter's latest change to make its product more user-friendly.
Dorsey introduced Moments -- an alternative lens for casual users -- in October just one day after he was renamed CEO of the company. Twitter also extended its 140 character limit in private messages, as well as introduced a display of "while you were away" tweets.
Would a 10,000 character limit mean an end to long strings of numbered tweets -- known as "tweetstorms"?
Not so. "I love tweetstorms! Those won't go away," said Dorsey.

Source: CNN

Nigeria Oil Production Slump: Angola overtakes Nigeria in crude oil production – OPEC

Crude oil production from Nigeria fell by 250,000 barrels per day in November, making the country lose its status as Africa’s top oil producer to Angola, latest data from the Organisation of Petroleum Exporting Countries has shown.

Nigeria recorded the biggest drop in output in November among its peers in OPEC, followed by Saudi Arabia, the group’s biggest producer.

OPEC, in its latest monthly oil market report, put crude oil production from Nigeria at 1.607 million bpd in November based on direct communication, down from 1.812 million bpd in October. Meanwhile Angola saw its oil output drop to 1.722 million bpd last month from 1.762 million bpd in October.

Apply Here For Job Vacancy At JAGAL Group

Company Information
 JAGAL Group is a leading Nigerian conglomerate with operations in the Oil & Gas, Construction and Manufacturing industries. The company has been growing successfully over the past 40 years, and has become a valuable and respected contributor to the development of the country’s economy.

Jagal offers diverse career opportunities across all its business activities. The Group’s broad range of industries and services offer rewarding prospects for various professional backgrounds and can satisfy ambitions for a successful future career.

JAGAL Group is recruiting to fill the position of:

Job Title: Crane Operator

Job Ref: 530
 Location: Lagos, Nigeria

Job Purpose

Apply Here For Job Vacancies At Travelfix.CO

Company Description Travelfix.CO is Africa’s fastest growing online travel company, which provides online booking platform for domestic and international air travel, hotel bookings, holiday packages and car rentals. We connect travelers to a large inventory of Airlines tickets, more than 200,000 hotels worldwide in addition to Airport transfers and Tour packages. Travelfix.CO assists travellers by offering them unique travel services to make travel easy and affordable for them.

Job Title: General ManagerJob Description
 The travel market is evolving, competition is becoming fierce and opportunity is massive. At Travelfix.CO, we’re completely involved in all travel activities. Our mission is to develop a creative travel experience for all classes of people from all over the world making traveling a lifestyle.
 We have an exciting opportunity for an experienced and highly driven individual to join our Finance team in a new role as “Finance Manager” and “Accountant”. In this role, you will be responsible for delivery of financial reporting, finance strategy and profit improvement initiatives, forecasting and planning for the business, analytics insight – to provide transparency in performance and support prime decision making to drive profitability and utmost value

Apply Here For Job Vacancy At NERI Nigeria

Company Profile
NERI Nigeria-An International Development Organization is seeking applications from qualified Nigerian nationals for the following

Job Category
Logistics, Procurement, Store-Keeping
 
Job Experience
 5 years

Job Location
 Abuja

Job Title: Roving Procurement Officer
Job Description
 The Roving Procurement Officer will support the procurement of goods and services required for a busy international development office under the project task order. S/He will be responsible for
 Ensuring that procurements and logistics operations are carried out strictly in accordance with the IDO policies, regulations and local law;
 Maintaining the complete documentation and filing system for all procurement including the proposal, evaluation reports, negotiation memorandums, award documents, relevant correspondence etc.;
 Serving as the point person related to any procurement of goods and services for the program either for direct use under the project task order, or as part of the in-kind grant of Direct Distribution of Goods and Services (DDGS) activity;  and
 Coordinating procurement actions with the program’s technical lead in order to ensure timely and satisfactory delivery of goods and services. This position will be based at the head office, located in Abuja, with program activities and expected to be carried out in the North Eastern states. Travel is expected.

Job Qualification
 BA, BSc, HND

Method of Application
 Qualified Persons should forward CV and Application to nigeria_recruitment@neri-nigeria.com

Application Closing Date
 23 December 2015